Month: May 2005

Oh, the irony.

Hilary Rosen: Steve Jobs, Let my Music Go [via]

Tags: copyright, DRM

Five’s version of the celebrity reality show format The Farm returned to our screens last night. I always try to avoid watching programmes like this but often I’m drawn in against my will.

Quite by accident whilst flicking through tv channels I caught a part of the first show where they introduced all the ‘celebrities’ and amongst the usual has-beens and nobodies was a face I never expected to see, Mr. Ron Jeremy, Porn Star.

I’ve been fascinated by him since I watched the documentary Porn Star: The Legend of Ron Jeremy, not the best looking guy in porn by a long shot but he seemed like a genuinely nice guy and in many ways a kind of tragic figure as well.

Now a farmhand on this reality show Ron Jeremy met in many ways his pig equivalent.

The Farmhands were then introduced to The Farm’s resident boar, Nick.

“Nick has testicles and so he can be quite unpredictable,” Jon said.

“So this guy gets to go with all those girls?” asked a visibly impressed Ron.

“The breeding sows get pregnant by artificial insemination,” continued Ryan. “We do this so that we can introduce new blood to the breed,” he told the porn star adding, “it’s not pretty, Ron.”

Apparently Nick’s purpose on The Farm is mostly to act as a ‘teaser’- titillating the female pigs and getting them in the mood for love.

“He’s got a very strange demeanour this pig,” Ryan informed. “He looks gormless. Mind you, you look like that if you have sex a lot,” he concluded.

Tags: sex

Yet more Star Wars shit!

Tags: Star Wars

Apparently the US government is pushing through a bill that will introduce a de facto national ID card system on the back of a another bill on military spending. Curiously many US citizens are unaware that it is happening.

FAQ: How Real ID will affect you
By Declan McCullagh
Staff Writer, CNET News.com

What’s all the fuss with the Real ID Act about?
President Bush is expected to sign an $82 billion military spending bill soon that will, in part, create electronically readable, federally approved ID cards for Americans. The House of Representatives overwhelmingly approved the package–which includes the Real ID Act–on Thursday.

What does that mean for me?
Starting three years from now, if you live or work in the United States, you’ll need a federally approved ID card to travel on an airplane, open a bank account, collect Social Security payments, or take advantage of nearly any government service. Practically speaking, your driver’s license likely will have to be reissued to meet federal standards. The Real ID Act hands the Department of Homeland Security the power to set these standards and determine whether state drivers’ licenses and other ID cards pass muster. Only ID cards approved by Homeland Security can be accepted “for any official purpose” by the feds.

UnRealID
Papers, Please!

Real ID = National ID Card

This Tuesday, the US Senate is scheduled to vote on the implementation of a national ID card system. The Real ID Act is nothing less than a Real National ID Act. The only thing left to the individual states is to decide which pretty picture they will choose to put on the card: everything else will be controlled by Washington DC bureaucrats.

The Real ID Act has never been debated on the US Senate floor. They’ve never talked about it in any committee. Heck, most of them haven’t even read it! Yet they’re planning to vote on it on Tuesday, no questions asked.

For more on the Real ID Act and why it is an ineffective waste of money that will actually introduce security problems rather than solve a security issue take a look at Bruce Schneier’s excellent blogpost and read the comments if you have time.

Tags: ID cards, security

Yahoo News: Loews Goes Reel Time

By Josh Grossberg Wed May 4, 8:47 PM ET

Hate going to the movies and having a commercial-a-thon break out?

This might be the news you’ve been waiting for.

Coming soon to a theater near you: actual start times for feature presentations.

In response to gripes from customers about the increasing number of ads, PSAs, promotions and sneak previews running before a film, Loews, the nation’s third-largest theater chain, has announced that it will soon start publicizing the real times that movies unspool.

But there’s a catch. Beginning next month, Loews will include in its newspaper and Web listings a note alerting customers that “the feature presentation starts 10 to 15 minutes after the posted show time.”

I do sympathise with customers who feel we trick them into arriving too early and bombarding them with adverts but it isn’t a simple task to actually post the times of the start of the movie.

All the times quoted for films at our cinema are for the start of the full performance including the adverts and trailers because they are of variable length it is never certain quite when the main feature will start so we never post the time for it.

Also just to complicate matters any performance for a movie that is only playing once or twice in a week will probably not have any adverts or trailers as we only have a limited number and it is too much hassle for the projectionist to detach them from another print to play with such a movie.

However as a small cinema that isn’t part of a major chain we tend to play far fewer actual adverts and customers generally quite enjoy the trailers for forthcoming features in any case.

Tags: cinema

Beautiful day today. I woke up, had a bath whilst reading a book, got dressed in black jeans and a red Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy t-shirt and then at 11 am took a leisurely stroll down to the polling booth in the village hall.

As usual there was no one else there apart from the election officials. I don’t know if it’s due to the time when I vote, usually mid-morning, or if my village is just one of those places with a very low voter turnout.

There were however a few old folks in the vicinity so I guess they had just voted. I gave a smile and a ‘good morning’ to the grey-haired lady by the door and the gentleman by the desk who gave me my ballot papers. I marked the papers using the pencil provided (it’s only just occurred to me the potential for voting fraud that a pencil gives) stuck them in the box then made a hasty exit as a half-dozen more voters arrived.

Now I shall sit back and wait for Michael Ancram to be returned as my Member of Parliament despite my vote for the Liberal Democrat named Hornby.

In many ways I feel I’m residentially disenfranchised (a phrase stolen from historian Simon Schama) in that I live in a constituency where the MP has such a large majority that whichever way I vote has very little effect on the outcome. In addition there is also very little choice in parties to vote for, just the big three and the UKIP so in many ways my vote is for the best of a bad bunch.

Tags: me, politics

Last night I watched the crazy shit that was Dr Tatiana’s Sex advice to all creation, the world’s first science musical!

What could be more fascinating than copulating Honeybees exploding and kinky Dolphins that have sex with Turtles, not to mention the Sea Hares who form mating chains with each impregnating the creature in front.

Dear Dr Tatiana
I’m a queen bee, and I’m worried. All my lovers leave their genitals inside me and then drop dead. Is this normal?
Perplexed in Cloverhill

For your lovers, this is the way the world ends – with a bang, not a whimper. When a male honeybee reaches his climax, he explodes, his genitals ripped from his body with a loud snap. I can see why you find this unnerving. Why does this happen? Alas, Your Majesty, your lovers explode on purpose. By leaving their genitals inside you, they block you up. In doing so, each male hopes you will not be able to mate with another. In other words, his mutilated member is intended as the honeybee version of a chastity belt.

There’s more to come tonight.

The TV show is based upon the book of the same name by Dr Tatiana aka Dr Olivia Judson of Imperial College London.

Tags: books, sex, TV